Since design jobs are often hard to come, Alexandra Bagão shares her advice on how she handled being offered two jobs at the same time—and the guilt she had to manage from choosing between them.
For months, I had been freelancing, which brought me little happiness. It meant I was engaged in intensive job hunting—and a fair share of existential crises. Suddenly, and very much out-of-the-blue, I received two job offers. Both were incredibly interesting, and both fit the requirements I was looking for. I barely told a soul (God forbid I would jinx things). I couldn’t believe my luck.
However, during my ‘too good to be true’ moment I was both grateful and utterly confused. I was surprised to find myself thinking this was actually a problem that I needed to solve, rather than an opportunity to take advantage of. All because I couldn’t bring myself to decide.
Being presented with two job offers, and knowing I could only choose one, made me feel ungrateful.
While job hunting, I always expected the process to be straightforward: you search, you interview, there is a job offer, and you accept. I had received my fair share of rejection emails so, in all honesty, I wasn’t expecting that two different companies—at the same time—would see value in me where so many others apparently didn’t, and for what it felt like so long! Being presented with two job offers, and knowing I could only choose one, made me feel ungrateful. My thoughts raced: “This company reached out to me first, they took a chance on me. If I decline I’ll be letting them down”; “This one offers great career progression, but the other team is so cool!”… Faced with this internal struggle of ‘reason versus feelings’, I decided to ask for help. I needed to find a way to put all my thinking into the right boxes and understand what ultimately matters for my life, regardless of any job.
Here is some of the advice I received:
Perspective
For a start, finding yourself with two job offers isn’t a problem (which is what I had actually thought). It’s a great position to be in! It means you’re valued and people are interested in your skillset. This allows you to choose which offer better fits you. It might be overwhelming, but you’re already winning in comparison to when you had no offers.
Second—and most importantly—you’re the only one who can decide what’s right for you. Ultimately, you’re going to have to sit down and think it through. This might contradict the purpose of ‘asking for advice’, however, the advice you receive only adds to your thinking. It should not make the decision for you. In my case, the advice made a huge difference in the process.
Assess the Pros and Cons
This seems obvious, but while some people might advise you to opt for the higher pay, there are other things to consider which are just as important, if not more important than money—especially if this is your first job. This list of ‘other criteria’ is personal, but the assessment should be based on things that connect with you, what you value and want for your future.
You might want to think about financial security, career progression/experience, team culture, the least/most stressful option. Either way, it’s especially worth considering what you want to get out of ‘a job’—independent of the offers—and then see which one comes closer to providing it.
Work isn’t all your life
Consider an opportunity like this as a way to enable the life you want to live. If you’re looking for security, to pay a mortgage or to rent a house, then one of the points in your ‘pros and cons’ list might be certainty (as opposed to volatility). If, on the other hand, you’re established in your career but bored of or unhappy with your current work, then something more adventurous might be what you’re looking for. Either way, I was reminded that work is an add-on to your life. It’s not everything. Keeping this in mind when deciding on job offers might make things easier.
Ask for advice
Asking for help isn’t always our first option, especially with something so personal. But, while it’s true that you’re the only one who can decide, asking for advice from people with more experience or who’ve been in the same situation before can help put things in perspective. If—like me—you ‘think through talking’, then it’s even more important to ask for advice because it will help you describe and identify what matters to you, leading to a less diffuse vision of your own thinking.
Whichever option you take, make it yours
Regardless of which option you choose, commit to it. Don’t dwell on the choice you made, wondering what could’ve been if you’d made a different decision. Otherwise, this attitude will ruin the job you’ve taken. It’s important to believe in yourself and in your decisions, to acknowledge this was the best option for you at this point (!); that the future is ahead of you. So, make the most of this opportunity; put your heart into it—own it!
Regardless of which option you choose, commit to it. Don’t dwell on the choice you made, wondering what could’ve been if you’d made a different decision. Otherwise, this attitude will ruin the job you’ve taken.
Keep in touch
As we all know, networking is key. Keep in touch with the company you declined. Remember, they saw value in you so keeping these connections is always a good idea and it respects them.
Give both companies genuine reasons for your choice (the offer you declined and the offer you accepted). You owe an explanation to the people that believe in you. The company you declined should see the honesty in your words and hopefully value you even more. The company you accepted should have a clear idea of why you chose them over someone else, and where your heart really is.
You are not letting anyone down
Having to say ‘no’ to a company that you like, and that gave you a good opportunity isn’t—for most of us—all that easy. There’s more than a shred of guilt. At times, I wished I could’ve divided myself. But you’re not letting anyone down personally. The reality is they can replace you with someone else—as sad as that might sound. Everyone is replaceable when it comes to work.
Last, but not least, this isn’t going to be your job for life
Previously, jobs were often seen as a choice for life. However, today this isn’t the case so take some pressure off yourself… This is a great opportunity—at this moment in time. But if it turns out to be not so great (for whatever reason), you’ve learned a lot in that role and there are other options out in the world. So take it easy!
All this advice, in one way or another, helped me to deal with my unreasonable guilt, to put my brain in order and guide me to a decision that I am very happy with at the moment. And I can say this with certainty because I truly understand what all this means for my life as a whole, not just for my career.